Today is the day it all beings. I wake up with a fierce hangover. Drinking that many beers last night with the film crew I just met was not a good idea. Especially when I have to spend the next few hours sorting out insurance.
Insurance you ask? Yes. Car insurance. I've decided, against all well intentioned and practical advice, to buy a car. It's marginally more expensive than renting one for the 18 days of the trip, but I can sell it at the end. And even if I get a few hundred bucks for her, it's then cheaper than a rental.
3hrs of solid phone calls later and I've done it. I start jumping around like a moron. I'm delerious. Not only have I got insurance but:
- They've taken into account my 7 years no claims
- They asked if I had any motoring convictions, I said not in the US and therefore I have a clean licence
- They accepted my motel room as my address without a qualm
It's costing me $26 for one month. Full third party liability insurance, valid in all the states. The only stipulation is that I need to get an American driver's licence within 30 days. Fine! I'll be out of the country by then.
11:00 and we set off to buy my beast. Here she is:
A 1984 Ford LTD Crown Victoria, with a 5 litre V8 engine. This thing is huge. Take the biggest Jaguar on sale in the UK today and add another foot and you get the length. It seats three across in the front - with seat belts! And the massive V8 throws out a massive 210 bhp (I later discover this was actually 140 bhp). Oh. Still, she looks awesome and drove fantastic in the test yesterday. Apart from breaking down. Once or twice.
An hour or so of paperwork later, and the car is mine! As I drive the vendor and I round to their other office which has the card machine, she conks out. Twice. Hmm. He assures me it's because it's a hot day and that his '71 Mustang does exactly the same thing. The word "no warranty" flash through my mind as I throw caution to the wind and pay for it anyway.
Driving off, a sense of dread creeps in. She stalls. She stalls again. I drive to Walmart and I reckon she's conked out over a dozen times. I'm now fearing that the battery isn't going to take this kind of hammering and wonder how many more starts I can do before I'm out of juice. She seems to be OK when the revs are up, but when idling or low revving she definately isn't a happy bunny.
In full survival mode, my Walmart purchases consist of:
- Spanners
- Adjustable Wrench
- Screw Drivers
- Hammer
- Tow Rope
- Jump Leads
- Emergency Rations
I am not feeling optimistic. So I decide to go for a coffee and look up a good local mechanic. As I drive off I discover I can keep her from stalling as long as I keep the revs up. This would be easy in a manual car, but she's an automatic. But for now, I've worked out that:
1. When idling and turning, the power steering pump is causing her to stall. Rev, turn, drive.
2. Air con is probably not helping either. Windows down.
3. Left foot on brake, right foot on accelerator, blip every now and then and all is well.
I make it to Starbucks without stalling once, and then see a mechanic next door. A quarter of an hour the verdict is returned: she just needs a tune up. Apparently the plugs/leads/cap haven't been changed since new, and otherwise she is mechanically perfect. Not fine mind, perfect. A "cream puff" according to the mechanic who then said I should detail her and put her in competitions. "You just don't find these old ones in this condition any more".
Holy cow. My earlier fear is reversed. I've not bought a junker. I've bought a well looked after mint classic! I ask him how much. $379. Ouch. I tell him I'll think about it and decide to get a few days under my belt as she is before deciding on whether or not to spend that much cash.
And so I start driving. I drive the beast around mountain passes, through valleys and gorges and am having the time of my life. But the day isn't over yet.
Shayla and Sarah who work for Black Hills Aerial Adventures, had earlier in the week promised to take me shooting, having been shocked to discover I'd never fired a gun. And holy cow, what an experience! I cannot tell you how loud those things are, and it was quite an adrenaline rush. The funniest thing of course is that both these girls learnt to shoot at 7, and it's completely normal for them, and there I am swearing every time the damn thing goes off and wincing in fear!
Car: $2599
Gas: $37
Food: $35
Accomodation: Free
Mileage:
Total Cost: $2671
